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When you’re self aware, you realize when you’re in a bad habit mode.
I want you to look at your life right now, because this is about you, not about me.
Do I have some bad habits? Absolutely.
And when I catch myself in a bad habit cycle, I really have a cold dose of reality.
You see, every morning when we wake up, we try to eliminate our bad habits. A lot of us wake up always refreshed and feeling positive. Feeling like today is going to be the day we are going to finally eliminate the bad habits.
We get excited.
And what happens? Well, bad habits are hard to break.
For those of you who are overweight, you know how soothing those carbs and sugars can be for you.
For those of you who are frustrated the way your body looks, you know how easy it is to avoid going to the gym.
For a lot of you, you can’t seem to connect with the opposite sex on a deeper level.
And you know the bad habits are holding you back.
Bad habits are really challenging.
They’re really difficult.
Especially when those habits become ingrained deeper and even deeper.
The more you do the bad habits, the most you’re cognizant of that habit, the more you are constantly living the bad habit.
And that’s where the real challenge starts to come.
So how do we get rid of these bad habits?
- The first thing is recognition.
You want to recognize the bad habits. You want to look at that bad habit, and you want to ask yourself: how long have I been doing this bad habit for?
You need a little bit of reality.
You really need to understand how deeply ingrained this bad habit has …
Do you ever run in and see somebody that you know you know?
You instantly feel something for them, a sense of attraction or sense of familiarity, but you just can’t place it. You think, well maybe that’s just somebody I want to know.
Then all of a sudden, you start talking to them and you realize you do know them. They look at you, they smile because they know you. But, you don’t remember where you know them from. But you know they’re a good person. You know that you’ve shared some type of moment with them.
But, you don’t remember where or when.
I have met so many people in my life that occasionally I’ll run into somebody and I don’t remember where I know them from. I could’ve gone out on a date with them years back.
It could’ve been somebody who was in one of my bigger seminars.
I like to talk to them and have a wonderful connection with them because I have met so many people in my life, but I don’t remember everybody or even how I first met them.
But, here is something that I do know.
It’s a feeling that I have.
If I run into somebody that I don’t remember exactly where I shared a moment with them or how I know them, I have a feeling. That feeling connects me to them. I know they’re a good person.
I know that I’ve had a moment with them in the past.
I have a gentle, warm feeling all over even if I can’t remember exactly where and when we had our moment.
But, it’s interesting. People will leave me with an everlasting feeling. That’s really what matters. It’s not the details that matter, but it’s the energy that you have …
I hope the first word that comes to your mind is not drugs or alcohol, because you’re just medicating what is bothering you.
We all have escapes.
We all have things that we need to do in order to escape the day-to-day life that we live.
Some of us come home and put the TV on for three or four hours, and we call it “zoning out.”
In reality, it’s really not zoning out. It’s escaping.
It’s escaping and avoiding whatever is truly bothering you, truly on your mind.
Some of us reach for drugs and alcohol.
We say it’s good to have a glass of wine or two a night, good for our heart, good for our blood.
Some would say it’s okay to smoke a joint after a rough day because it relaxes you.
But in reality, shouldn’t you be able to relax yourself?
Isn’t that what medication mindset is all about?
To be able to relax yourself, to be able to work on yourself and get past the things that’s stressing you out so you’re able to do it naturally.
Some of us shop.
We love it. We get to escape in the world of online shopping and online returning. During that process, we’re able to get our minds off of what truly is bothering us.
Look, I believe any escape, as long as it’s healthy, is fun and good and needed.
But when you self medicate on drugs, alcohol, shopping, things that continue to build up your credit card debt or continue to make you feel lousy the next morning, even if you overeat as one of the ways you can escape…
…then you’re doing more harm than good. You’re not looking at the problem itself.
You’re not looking at where you’re at in …
That’s right, I said it.
There’s a lot of millennial bashing going on.
Generalizations about millennials.
And as with any generalization, there’s going to be some truth to it.
Granted, millennials grew up and they got participation trophies and a lot of them didn’t learn to compete athletically, because everybody got to play, which I think is a hindrance to how you develop as a man.
There are thoughts that a lot of them are lazy, and they all just want to get rich because they’ve seen other people do it on Youtube and Instagram.
Is that their fault?
Well, it’s the generation that they grew up in, so what you see and how you grow up is how you want to dream as well.
I remember back in 1986 or 1987, there were people that would come into the bar that I was bartending at, and they would say how much they hated yuppies. Yuppies were cocky, arrogant men and women who were kicking ass in finance and advertising and other things. They drove nice cars, they did cocaine, whatever it might be.
There was always an older generation that said how much they hated that yuppies didn’t have to work as hard as they did, and they always had generalizations.
Well, I’m the older generation now, and I don’t think millennials are that awful.
As a matter of fact, I love millennials.
All generations have their faults and their faults derive from how they grew up.
Millennials are, generally, socially lazy.
They’d rather swipe than actually talk to people.
Well, they grew up that way.
They grew up texting.
They grew up on AOL Instant Messenger.
They grew up on social media, so of course when that is shoved in front of their face 24/7, why do they …
Living in Los Angeles, I have been around plastic surgery.
The other day at the gym I was watching Kathie Lee Gifford speak.
I look at her 65-year-old face. I look at her 65-year-old body. And I think to myself, that’s a nice body, but what is that alien doing on it.
You look at Joan Rivers, when she was alive. You look at Burt Reynolds.
Look at Cher.
Look at all the women who don’t want to age, and they fuck with their face.
They look like aliens.
Look at them side by side.
What’s the difference?
All these women that don’t want to age look like an alien’s first-born daughter.
They’re like a cross between human and alien.
Let’s not even talk about the things that people do to the rest of their bodies.
Instead of going and working out and losing the weight the right way, they’d rather go get massive liposuction, have six to eight weeks off, and then when they’re finally able to work out again, the fat, from sitting around on their ass, for six to eight weeks has deposited somewhere else.
Of course they get frustrated, and then, the next year they go back to the plastic surgeon’s office and get that off which in turn makes the fat move to the next area. Google it. You’ll see I’m right. It’s amazing how many people would rather take the plastic surgery shortcut than actually do the hard work.
All plastic surgery does is give you a reason to be lazier.
If you’ve got the money you just think, well, a little nip, a little tuck here, I’ll be fine.
But the problem is a little nip, and little tuck there makes the fat not come back to the spot where it was, it …
There are two things that I truly believe in life:
- To remain consistent, and
- To truly live an authentic life.
You must be truthful about who you are.
I know we live in a society now where we can be a super hero versions of ourselves and post ridiculous comments on Facebook and other places to make us larger than life, better than we are.
I know online dating. Most people lie, post pictures of themselves that are younger, skinnier, whatever it might be.
But, the only way you will ever grow is if you’re truthful about yourself.
All the time, you meet somebody and tell them you used to be something.
I used to be successful.
I used to be really thin.
I used to be happier.
I used to take care of myself and eat healthy.
But yet, the person you are right now is none of the above.
The other person believes you. But, the question is: are you really being truthful about what you used to be?
We have this ridiculous habit as human beings to manufacture the past.
We like to change the past in a lot of different ways.
We like to change up the past in relationships. Sometimes we romanticize the past. We think we should be with somebody that we used to be with. We remember only the good, but not the bad. Not the truth.
And, we do the same thing with ourselves.
For instance, you may have never been in great shape your entire life, and yet, compared to how you are now, you used to be in great shape. You understand where the dysfunction works in this manner.
Taking this as an example, maybe you’re not in good physical condition. Maybe you’re overweight, maybe you’re muscles are not toned. …
I decided to have a quest for 2019.
Glad you asked.
I want to masculate the feminized man.
I’m tired of the MeToo movements, I’m tired of the masculine woman.
Now, don’t get what I say wrong.
If a woman isn’t physically abused, emotionally abused, mentally abused, or any abuse from a man, Bill Cosby, or a Matt Lauer, or any of that stuff, I am strongly on the side of the woman, and I think a man who does that needs to be brought to justice.
But a woman doesn’t always need to air her shit in public and talk about it. To me, that’s a very private thing, a private thing that deserves one-on-one attention, one-on-one help to heal.
You’re not going to heal by pounding MeToo on social media. Not going to happen at all.
And what happens, is you give these feminine men another reason not to be masculine.
You wouldn’t believe the amount of time that I have e-mails from men, literally saying:
You know, I don’t know how to approach women anymore, because if I do approach a woman, it’s going to be a MeToo event.
And I’m going to get in trouble, and I’m going to lose my job, and I’m going to do this.
No, it’s just another excuse that men have come up with to be emasculated, because most women crave and desire a real man to walk over there and talk to them, instead of being approached on an Internet dating site or a dating app.
They’re not going to sit there and put a MeToo all over you, but the fact is these men have become so emasculated and so weak that they use this as another excuse not to be a man.
As I said, the …