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When you’re self aware, you realize when you’re in a bad habit mode.
I want you to look at your life right now, because this is about you, not about me.
Do I have some bad habits? Absolutely.
And when I catch myself in a bad habit cycle, I really have a cold dose of reality.
You see, every morning when we wake up, we try to eliminate our bad habits. A lot of us wake up always refreshed and feeling positive. Feeling like today is going to be the day we are going to finally eliminate the bad habits.
We get excited.
And what happens? Well, bad habits are hard to break.
For those of you who are overweight, you know how soothing those carbs and sugars can be for you.
For those of you who are frustrated the way your body looks, you know how easy it is to avoid going to the gym.
For a lot of you, you can’t seem to connect with the opposite sex on a deeper level.
And you know the bad habits are holding you back.
Bad habits are really challenging.
They’re really difficult.
Especially when those habits become ingrained deeper and even deeper.
The more you do the bad habits, the most you’re cognizant of that habit, the more you are constantly living the bad habit.
And that’s where the real challenge starts to come.
So how do we get rid of these bad habits?
- The first thing is recognition.
You want to recognize the bad habits. You want to look at that bad habit, and you want to ask yourself: how long have I been doing this bad habit for?
You need a little bit of reality.
You really need to understand how deeply ingrained this bad habit has …
Here’s something you see almost daily, especially while driving: the drifter and texter.
I would say if you count the amount of times you see this happen, you would run out of fingers on your hands and toes.
There are a few versions of these clueless assholes: There’s the walker texter, there’s the elevator texter, and there’s the person who really doesn’t give a shit if anybody else is there, because they need to get that text in.
Well, that person just starts drifting into a light. They see the red light, they grab their precious phone, their slimy, greasy iPhone screen that’s never clean, it’s like a borderline for bacteria and leprosy.
They know that there’s a red light coming up, so they’ll start slowing down, and then they’ll put their head in the position of downward motion, a position that only used to be reserved for cunnilingus and blowjobs.
Anyway, they’ll usually leave at least three or four car lengths ahead. They tend to be the person you need to honk at to wake up, because they still have to get that text or Instagram post or whatever the fuck it is in.
Then you have another version: the walker texter. Walking down a busy city street with not a clue that anybody else is around. They’ll just walk right into you if you allow it. Why?
Because they’ve got to get their text in.
Very, very important to get back to somebody who’s not there. They’re not even part of your current reality, and that’s what makes no sense.
People just spend so much time more concerned with people that aren’t in their current reality than people that are actually in their current reality.
So that’s what a modern asshole looks like.
So today I want you …
How do you feel when I say that word, struggle?
It’s a very uncomfortable feeling.
But really, struggling just means that you’re not accomplishing what you want to accomplish.
Whatever task you have at that present moment feels like a mountain that you need to climb.
Lately, I’ve been learning the stock market.
In the beginning I was doing well, but then I hit a pitfall. I had one bad day.
Ever since then, what was once fun has been a complete struggle.
And yet, I continue to study. I continue to read, watch videos, take courses.
But still I continue to have a daily struggle.
I’ve probably spent about 4 hours a day trading the market. Most of the time I break even.
It’s a struggle.
It’s a struggle to overcome my fears.
I have fear when I’m in there.
Am I going to lose? Am I going to lose money? Let me get out, fast, I don’t want to lose.
I’ve got that whole have-to-win mentality, when in reality, losing is all part of the game, and it’s all part of life.
Nobody can win all the time.
Nobody, not even Bill Belichick.
Not even Tom Brady.
Nobody wins all the time.
There are losses in life.
And through the losses, you actually learn some of the most valuable lessons that you ever can have.
To get over the hump.
To get to the next level of you, it’s going to be a struggle.
There’s no way around it.
Because if there was a way around it, we’d all figure it out and we’d all buy a program, a drug, whatever it might be to get around the struggle.
I sit in my struggles four hours a day. It’s not fun.
It’s not fun to …
I hope the first word that comes to your mind is not drugs or alcohol, because you’re just medicating what is bothering you.
We all have escapes.
We all have things that we need to do in order to escape the day-to-day life that we live.
Some of us come home and put the TV on for three or four hours, and we call it “zoning out.”
In reality, it’s really not zoning out. It’s escaping.
It’s escaping and avoiding whatever is truly bothering you, truly on your mind.
Some of us reach for drugs and alcohol.
We say it’s good to have a glass of wine or two a night, good for our heart, good for our blood.
Some would say it’s okay to smoke a joint after a rough day because it relaxes you.
But in reality, shouldn’t you be able to relax yourself?
Isn’t that what medication mindset is all about?
To be able to relax yourself, to be able to work on yourself and get past the things that’s stressing you out so you’re able to do it naturally.
Some of us shop.
We love it. We get to escape in the world of online shopping and online returning. During that process, we’re able to get our minds off of what truly is bothering us.
Look, I believe any escape, as long as it’s healthy, is fun and good and needed.
But when you self medicate on drugs, alcohol, shopping, things that continue to build up your credit card debt or continue to make you feel lousy the next morning, even if you overeat as one of the ways you can escape…
…then you’re doing more harm than good. You’re not looking at the problem itself.
You’re not looking at where you’re at in …
There are two things that I truly believe in life:
- To remain consistent, and
- To truly live an authentic life.
You must be truthful about who you are.
I know we live in a society now where we can be a super hero versions of ourselves and post ridiculous comments on Facebook and other places to make us larger than life, better than we are.
I know online dating. Most people lie, post pictures of themselves that are younger, skinnier, whatever it might be.
But, the only way you will ever grow is if you’re truthful about yourself.
All the time, you meet somebody and tell them you used to be something.
I used to be successful.
I used to be really thin.
I used to be happier.
I used to take care of myself and eat healthy.
But yet, the person you are right now is none of the above.
The other person believes you. But, the question is: are you really being truthful about what you used to be?
We have this ridiculous habit as human beings to manufacture the past.
We like to change the past in a lot of different ways.
We like to change up the past in relationships. Sometimes we romanticize the past. We think we should be with somebody that we used to be with. We remember only the good, but not the bad. Not the truth.
And, we do the same thing with ourselves.
For instance, you may have never been in great shape your entire life, and yet, compared to how you are now, you used to be in great shape. You understand where the dysfunction works in this manner.
Taking this as an example, maybe you’re not in good physical condition. Maybe you’re overweight, maybe you’re muscles are not toned. …
I want to explain fear to you.
Fear is the overwhelming emotion that conquers you when you’re trying to get past something.
We have “here-we-go-again” syndrome that comes in with fear, and it’s really powerful.
Here we go again.
I can’t believe this happened to me again.
Then the emotions come out.
We get all tight inside.
We have the feeling of impeding doom.
No matter how hard we’ve studied something, no matter how hard we prep, there’s always going to be something that triggers fear within us.
It’s a really big challenge, and it’s probably one of the biggest challenges that we will have as human beings.
I’ve been coaching you guys for 20 years, and you always say, “Well David, it’s so easy for you.”
It is. I can go talk to any girl, any place, any time.
It’s a piece of cake. I don’t even think about it.
There’s no anxiety.
If I want to talk to somebody, I talk to them.
It’s just another human being.
We’re just going to have an interaction and see what happens from there.
I have a lot of empathy and compassion. That’s why, for all these years, I’ve been a great coach for you guys who are struggling with trying to make a move on the opposite sex.
Now, trading is my venture. My new challenge. I enjoy this challenge. It’s great. But it’s frustrating as hell.
I pretty much break even every week. Now, you think, “Oh wow, that sucks. You put all this time in and you’re just breaking even?”
But in reality, that’s a win. It’s a huge, huge, huge win.
I mean, I haven’t been live trading for a year yet. I started in July of 2018.
Since Thanksgiving, I’m down a whole $650. That’s it. …