finding love

now browsing by category

 
Posted by: | Posted on: May 12, 2019

Wouldn’t you like a man to take care of YOU

Wouldn’t you like a man to take care of YOU

You’re tired,

You’re tired of working ten hours a day.

You’re tired of six hours of sleep per night.

You’re tired of commuting to and from work.

You’re tired of having to handle everything yourself: the laundry, making dinner, car leases, insurance premiums, your wireless connection.

You’re tired of taking care of everybody – your aging parents, your screwed up siblings, your ungrateful boss, your average employees, your unappreciative kids.

Life is hard enough.

It’s much harder when your whole life involves giving rather than receiving.

If you’re like most of my Love U students, you give WAY more than you receive.

You’re like Sisyphus pushing a rock up a hill or Atlas carrying the world on his shoulders.

It’s tiring. It sucks. And nobody talks openly about it.

Have you ever spent long nights on the phone counseling a dear friend?

Have you ever spent thousands of dollars on veterinarian bills for a sick pet?

Have you ever worked longer than expected because you took pride in your work and wanted to please your boss or client?

Have you ever given an expensive gift to your less fortunate sister or your self-sacrificing mother?

Have you ever given more to a relationship than the relationship has given back to you?

I’ll bet you have.

What we see here is not just that you are generous but you are actually generous to a fault.

So, why am I bringing this up now, on the last day of this special Love U launch?

If anything, I wanted you to see something I see in you:

You are so committed to giving to others that you may neglect your own needs.

You put yourself out for a friend, for a pet, for a loved one, but when do you get the opportunity to …

Posted by: | Posted on: April 30, 2019

Why Good Relationships Are Easy (And Bad Relationships Take Work!)

Why Good Relationships Are Easy (And Bad Relationships Take Work!)

Over the past few weeks since you saw my Pyramid of Love, I’ve read your questions, comments and emails. You’re always as honest with me as I am with you.

You’ve told me how much men have disappointed you.

You’ve told me you’re wary of taking a chance and opening your heart again.

You’ve told me you’re looking for a shortcut to immediately let you know if a guy is a player, slacker, jerk, or alcoholic.

With such men…

You will constantly cry.

You will constantly fight.

You will constantly be disappointed.

You will constantly question yourself.

You will constantly agonize about where things are going.

You will constantly obsess how you can love someone so much and be so unhappy.

All those relationship issues force me to ask you a tough question.

If your boyfriend doesn’t consistently make you feel safe and happy, why are you in the relationship at all?

That may knock you sideways a bit. In fact, it may be difficult to admit to yourself:

You’ve hung onto the wrong men for your entire adult life.

In fact, that tenacity is a quality you took pride in – being able to push through, hold on tight and try to work things out with your partner.

Yet no relationship you’ve ever worked hard at has EVER lasted. Has it?

All relationships take some effort, but when that effort starts to feel like actual workyour relationship is not serving its purpose.

When I look at my happy marriage and the happy marriages of my clients, those relationships all have one overriding quality:

They’re EASY.

If that sounds hard to believe, that’s because you’ve never chosen an easy relationship before.

For you, love has always meant arguments, ups and downs and insecurity.

Or maybe you’re used …

Posted by: | Posted on: April 25, 2019

You Don’t Want to Miss This

You Don’t Want to Miss ThisTime is running out!

Okay, so that’s a bit of an overstatement.

Time isn’t running out.

You can find love at 38, 48, 58, 68 or 78.

I see proof of this every day from happy readers and clients.

But, as you already recognize from, dating DOES get tougher as you get older, which is the very reason to TAKE ACTION NOW.

And as you’ll see in a few hours, there ARE strategies for attracting better men (and repelling worse men) that you can use immediately.

And as you’ll see in a few hours, there ARE strategies for attracting better men (and repelling worse men) that you can use immediately.

On a personal note, I am brimming with excitement to connect with you.

I’ve got my 27” iMac bolted to my standing desk.

I’ve got my Yeti mic plugged in for better sound.

I’ve got my “script” prepared with some new ideas I’ve been preparing for you.:

  •      How to stop ignoring your feelings of anxiety and set healthy boundaries with men.
  •      The psychological phenomenon “habituation” and how it’s silently KILLING your relationships.
  •      What compatibility is, what it is not, and why it’s just as important as chemistry.

All you have to do is meet me on Facebook at 5:30pmPST/8:30pmEST to get some priceless advice about improving your relationships and making good men stick around.

At the end of the event, I’m going to tell you about the opportunity to join me in Love U – with weekly live coaching – and meet the man who “gets you” in the next six months.

And who knows? Maybe I’ll get an email from you that sounds a lot like the ones you’ve been reading at the end of all of my emails…

Here are the details of tonight’s big live event once …

Posted by: | Posted on: April 20, 2019

How You Can Attract Better Men and Get the Right One to Want to Commit.

How You Can Attract Better Men and Get the Right One to Want to Commit.

Mattie is 54.

She’d been married twice – including the most recent one for 22 years – and has had a few short-term relationships after her divorce.

All of her trial and error led Mattie to believe that something was wrong with her – that it was her fault these men were not sticking around.

You’ve probably experienced the same thing.

After a certain number of dates, you tend to internalize these ideas:

  1.   There’s something wrong with me.
  2.   There’s something wrong with men.

That’s what Mattie thought when she came to me.

Then she started embracing my coaching philosophies from Love U:

What happened next was a 180-degree turnaround from her previous 54 years:

Since I was 16 years old, I’ve longed for a lifetime love, someone who loves me as deeply as I love him. But all my relationships failed. Too many times, I fell fast and hard and loved a man more than he loved me. Or, I just never liked him very much.

I’m not a materially wealthy woman but I’ve been basically content with my life…However, when I started online dating, I did so knowing I’d achieved every major goal I’d set for myself—except one. I still had not found a true life partner.

Eventually, it became clear to me that your advice is the bomb. You don’t suggest dating gimmicks, tricks and formulas. Instead, you helped me understand how men think. Your book, “Why He Disappeared,” showed me all the mistakes I’d been making with men, including the two partners I’d briefly dated after separating and including my ex-husband who I married after a two-month courtship—before we really knew each other.

“Finding the One Online” prompted me to get professional photos taken and to rewrite my dating profile. As a result, not a week

Posted by: | Posted on: April 15, 2019

The Love U Pyramid of Love

The Love U Pyramid of Love

I don’t know about you, but I’m a lifelong learner.

My wife even mentioned it in our wedding vows – I’m the guy who is always trying to become a better husband, father, coach, businessman, and human being.

As such, I’ve embraced the idea that learning is a process – often, a slow and humbling one.

  •      You have to learn to put your face in the water before you become a competitive swimmer.
  •      You have to practice your scales before you can play a song on the piano.
  •      You have to study for the LSAT before you become a partner at the law firm.

None of this is surprising. You start with a limited base of knowledge, and, through repeated practice, build your skills up accordingly.

In the late ‘60’s, this learning process was described as “the four stages of competence”:

  1.    Unconscious incompetence – “you don’t know what you don’t know.”
  2.    Conscious incompetence – you know what you don’t know, but aren’t sure how   to do it.
  3.    Conscious competence – you know how to do it, but the skill requires      concentration and commitment.

When you’re consciously competent, you can legitimately call yourself a swimmer, a pianist or a lawyer. However, there’s one more phase of competence for those who aim higher.

  1.    Unconscious competence – your skill is second nature and do it without thinking.

If you’ve been at your job for over ten years, you’re probably “unconsciously competent” at it. As a dating coach for the past fifteen years, I’d like to think that describes me as well.

If you’ve been at your job for over ten years, you’re probably “unconsciously competent” at it. As a dating coach for the past fifteen years, I’d like to think that describes me as well.

But could I be a swimmer, pianist …